I wrote this post the day my grandmother, Leda Doolan, was laid to rest. Why I didn’t publish it then, is as much a mystery to me as life itself. That’s me, my sister, my grandfather Michael Doolan, and my grandmother Leda in the photo.

I started this blog because music inhabits my soul. Music is as much a part of me as family, music is the soundtrack to my life, my thoughts, and an outward extension of my emotions and feelings. I didn’t seek it out, it found me, and we have been friends since I was old enough to turn the radio on. If you are at all like me, music is a part of your daily life, and as it sometimes is running as a necessary backdrop to the day, there are times when the moment, the emotions, the thoughts, the situation, and the songs come together in way that seems as if everything is perfectly in sync for a few moments that remain etched in your memory forever. Moments of pure clarity and peace. I have those moments, and they are beautiful. I hope to experience those moments for the rest of my life.

Leda Doolan, is my grandmother. The earth lost Leda Doolan, December 24th, 2007. It wasn’t an unexpected loss, but a loss nonetheless. She lived a full life, and will be missed greatly. My intention of this post, which may be odd or uncomfortable to some reading, is not to dwell on the loss of life of my grandmother, but to celebrate the most recent memories that I have acquired during this time of her last days. This is not to say that I don’t have fond memories of her from before, but when the harsh realities of life and it’s inevitable destiny are staring you in the face, your senses and awareness are heightened to a new level. As the situation began to unfold into the recognition of what was to be experienced over the next few weeks or months, the later of which turned out to be the case, several of my experiences during this time were secured forever in my mind and heart with thoughts and songs along the way. It also presented to me a reality of how quickly time really disappears, and what is happening now, as much as we take it for granted, will dissipate quicker than we care to acknowledge or understand until we get to these junctures in life.

If “seizing the day” means living each day the best way you know how, no matter how simplified yet caring you do, then Leda Doolan “seized the day” every day of her life. And that is what she will be missed for by everyone who knew her.

MP3> St Vincent ‘Landmines’

MP3> Tiny Vipers ‘Forest on Fire’

MP3> Minus the Bear ‘Part 2’

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 13th, 2008 at 1:03 am and is filed under not quite forgotten.